Biblical encouragement for new moms is imperative to their survival. How do I know? It was one of the greatest helps through a year-long bout of postpartum depression after the birth of my first daughter. I wrote this post when she was only three months old to articulate my thoughts and encourage other new moms with the hope of Jesus. Enjoy!
As a new mama, there have been so many opportunities for my sin to be revealed and there have been moments of great discouragement. Trying to figure out what the heck I’m doing coupled with little to no sleep and hormones out of whack has left me desperate for Jesus like never before. Parenting is a great joy but it is also a great responsibility.
There are many days where my husband comes home from work eager to talk about his day and asks me, “So, what did you do today?” There is an internal struggle as I decide between responses, “Everything. . . nothing. . . ummm I kept a human being alive. . . ” Amidst the never-ending piles of laundry (So. Much. Laundry.) and the sometimes never-ending flow of spit up, the days have quickly dissolved into one big blur. My daughter is almost three months old, a quarter of a year, and I’m not sure how time has managed to slip by so fast.
This season, like every other, has its roses and thorns but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I am learning to be content with where the Lord has me and to be grateful for His faithfulness in conforming me to the image of Christ. The following five encouragements have been in my mind and on my heart as I’ve considered what wisdom I would offer a woman going through the season that I’m currently in. New mama, I hope these truths derived from Scripture encourage your heart as much as they have encouraged mine.
1. Give Yourself Grace
A few years ago there was a diapers campaign with the tagline, “Having a baby changes everything” and that sentiment couldn’t be
2. Wait For The Morning
As a parent of a newborn, I’ve learned that late nights and early mornings are going to be normal in this season.
A few verses that have encouraged me when my heart grows desperate for a lack of sleep (and brainpower) are Psalm 30:5 which reminds me that joy comes in the morning and Lamentations 3:22-23 which tells me His mercies are new every morning. I’ve faced a few discouraging and extremely long nights. Ultimately I am grateful for them because they humbled my heart and left me longing for fresh mercies which only He can supply.
3. Fix Your Eyes On Jesus
Running the race of the Christian life requires great endurance and I realized this more upon becoming a parent. My seasons of singleness and marriage had their own respective challenges but neither season had me so desperate for Jesus as this one. This doesn’t mean that motherhood is more holy or sanctifying than other roles or seasons. For
4. Do It For Joy
One of my goals this year is to memorize a portion of Scripture every week. Whether it’s one verse or a few, I desire to have God’s word in my mind and written on my heart. One of the verses I came across in my Bible reading plan that I decided to memorize is John 16:21, “When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish for joy that a human being has been born into the world.” The context of this verse is Jesus telling His disciples that He is departing to be with the Father but will one day return. He compares His absence to the pain women feel in labor and His return to the joy that is experienced upon the realization of new life. This was the verse I asked my husband to remind me of while I was in labor. Through
5. Remember Who You Are
This has probably been the biggest challenge for me as a new mama and I think it’s generally a challenge for women in every season – remembering the roots of our identity. I have had moments of pride spring up in my heart as I’ve received compliments on how quiet my baby is or how well she (sometimes) sleeps. During those times I’ve, in a sense, proudly worn my daughter like some kind of Badge of Excellence. In those moments I’ve failed to remember that I am a new creation and have been designed to worship God. Instead, I have chosen to worship my daughter and allow my identity to be expressed based on how she behaves. I’m sure this will be a struggle in every season but I’ve learned that when I sin in this way, I put an unrealistic expectation on her and must realize that as another sinner, she will never be able to perfectly satisfy my expectations. Instead of humbly being grateful for my new identity in Christ, I have pridefully allowed my new role to become my identity.
Another area in which I’ve failed to find my identity in Christ is body image. Instead of remembering that I am fearfully and wonderfully made and allowing my soul to know it well, I’ve beat myself up based on the number I see on the scale. Yes, my body is a temple and self-control is the fruit of the Spirit, but I tend to go to the extreme and turn these truths into the law that Jesus died to save me from. It is definitely discouraging having a closet full of clothes that don’t fit but my hope is that my heart will count even that as loss for the many ways I am gaining Christ in this season (Philippians 3:8). I have learned to be disciplined in cultivating healthy habits knowing that bodily training is, indeed of some value, but ultimately, the training should create in my heart a deeper desire to train myself for Godliness. It is this training in Godliness which reminds me that, “. . . It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself up for me,” Galatians 2:20.
Motherhood is hard but God is faithful.
He will not give you a season of life without giving you the grace to endure it in a way that is honoring and glorifying to Him.
“But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
Press on, mama.
If you enjoyed this, check out my post Serving From the Sidelines.
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This was sooo good to read today since I am going to be having my first baby next week. Thanks for the encouragement! I think giving myself grace will be the hardest thing.
Hi Jenna,
Thanks for reading and for the kind comment! Giving myself grace is the hardest thing I’ve had to do too! I try to consider the words of Paul in Romans 8:1, “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” It’s sweet to remember that I don’t have to “punish” myself for my failings because Jesus took the punishment for me. I try to remember that His grace is greater than my sin and even the silly mistakes I make as a new mama who doesn’t get much sleep! I pray you will remember that His grace is sufficient for you as you enter this new season! Congrats on your little one!
I am beyond the stage of new motherhood but I remember well the days! I wish that I had heard this message then. I stressed myself out so much trying to do everything “right” and feeling like a failure when I didn’t. The funny thing is, “right” is completely arbitrary and unattainable. The GRACE of Jesus Christ though, now that is something to hold on to. Thank you for this post. Oh, I found your post from The Peony Project.
Thanks for your kind comment Deborah – so fun to see another Peony on here! In the early days I battled anxiety and was so fearful that I was doing everything wrong only to realize that parenting just involves using wisdom. Yes, I too and so thankful for the grace of Jesus Christ!
Beautifully written little mama 🙂
Thanks D! Miss you and hope you are doing well. Thanks for taking the time to read! 🙂